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BLUF: I have a challenging employee who has worked in many ways to create tension and conflict in the group, cause dissent among peers and turn them against management, and overall give me one heck of a hard time as manager.  I've tried all of the ways I can think of via O3's, honest discussion, etc. to work through our issues, but the result is always the same. If I don't cave to my direct's demands RE: work hours, work from home, other policies, job duties, etc. the direct actively work to make my life miserable via HR, peers, etc.  In additon, the direct has threatened to use some of my "honest discussion" against me when I tried to empathize about organizational issues and other things that I noticed as well (rookie mistake, I guess).

What to do?

I could go on, but don't believe I need to.  The person has a non-disclosed but identifiable personality disorder which causes "splitting" and extreme polarization of the team.  Any feedback results in defensive maneuvers, emotional outbursts, etc.  The direct does an ok job and is not a superstar nor a terrible performer, however, the "extracurriculars" are way out of hand and take up an absurd amount of time.  I don't know how to manage someone like this using the MT model....how can you build a case for behaviors that break down the team when the team refuses to speak out to support the case?

VPfreedude's picture

 From reading your post with all the effort you have put in to set things right, I think (and i'm sure many will disagree with me) that it is time to move the problem out of your department.

In your shoes I would prepare the case for terminating the direct's employment (i.e. have your manager's and HR's approval).  Then I would give that employee one more O3 where you lay out the changes you need to see and the timeline he/she has to meet that and would simply state that the alternative is they will be let go and have to find employment elsewhere.

It may sound harsh but in my experience if you have expended numerous efforts to modify their behavior and it has not worked, it is time to replace the person.  

Just my 2 cents - best of luck with what sounds like a very frustrating position you are in.

 

 

 

 

 

VPfreedude's picture

 From reading your post with all the effort you have put in to set things right, I think (and i'm sure many will disagree with me) that it is time to move the problem out of your department.

In your shoes I would prepare the case for terminating the direct's employment (i.e. have your manager's and HR's approval).  Then I would give that employee one more O3 where you lay out the changes you need to see and the timeline he/she has to meet that and would simply state that the alternative is they will be let go and have to find employment elsewhere.

It may sound harsh but in my experience if you have expended numerous efforts to modify their behavior and it has not worked, it is time to replace the person.  

Just my 2 cents - best of luck with what sounds like a very frustrating position you are in.

 

 

 

 

 

BariTony's picture

Don't focus on their personality disorder. Focus on behavior. If you've been doing regular O3s, including coaching and feedback, then you should have plenty of documentation by this point. It's very important that you can document clear objectives. If he throws a temper tantrum, just don't respond. You layout the expectations and that's it (shot across the bow). If he doesn't improve his behavior or meet his objectives, document it.

Remember - Someone who won't be blackmailed can't be blackmailed. Don't give into his demands, especially if the company has clearly defined guidelines (ie, your company's work from home policy). If he goes to HR, fine. If he uses anything you candidly shared with him against you, that's fine, too. Just tell your boss and HR that you made a rookie mistake, it's a learning experience, and you won't do it again.

You may want to reach out to your supervisor and HR for guidance on how to manage the direct. I wouldn't indicate that you're trying to make the case for termination. Make sure that you've made an honest attempt to exhaust every avenue to improve their performance, keep HR and management informed, and you will have no problem recommending termination if it eventually comes to it.

jdpm311's picture

Thank you for your comments and input.  I agree with everything said.  I spoke with HR who supported exactly what both of you said.  They agreed that dealing with behavioral issues can be much more challenging than work performance issues.  I'm going to continue working with the employee to make sure that my feedback is being communicated clearly and understood, and then proceed down the line from there if needed.

I agree wholeheartedly that the focus cannot be on the disorder, but has to instead be on the behaviors.  If the disorder is managed properly and has little to no impact on performance or team dynamics, then it is of no consequence.  Thanks to all.

markjennifer08's picture

its better you fire him off. Otherwise at later stage not only there will be a problem created for you but also for other employees in the office as well.