Submitted by ctomasi on
I saw this one today and immediately thought of the Manager Tools listeners. I'll be we've all seen this (or done this) in the past.
I know there was a MT podcast about remembering names, but my search came up empty. Does anyone else remember it, or have better search results than I?
May of 2008
BTW, go to the Manager Tools Podcasts page, choose the "Etiquette" filter, and hit Submit.
That filtering works pretty well to zero in on old podcasts.
The most sticky point on remembering names for me is becoming obsessed with their name, and not worrying so much about remembering what they do. It's so much better to have them repeat what they do for a living or where they live than it is for them to repeat their name.
Their name is gold.
If you haven't listened to podcast, you should. The advice there is gold.
BTW, you shouldn't ask them to repeat anything unless you genuinely didn't hear what they said. You speak their name, and focus ONLY on remembering their name the first time you meet them.
I have and it's great. I didn't remember the part about not repeating anything unless I didn't hear it so thanks for that reminder.
True confession... I'm the manager that actually gets called out by Mark in that Podcast, so this is funny again! :)
They didn't say it, exactly, in the podcast, that's just my extrapolation of their guidance...
And man, I have done some pretty socially inept things myself, so that story of you telling the other person "Tell me your name again!" really struck a chord.
Thanks for the confession!
You're welcome! Mark and I had a good laugh. It was a teachable moment let's say.
I sure laughed (!) Mark
I sure laughed (!)
How to let them off the hook
I was talking to someone in my network the other night. He told me he ran into another friend of mine that I had introduced him to a couple of months ago, and he could not remmber the other persons name. I told him about this cast, and afterwards he gave me a quick tip, that I just had to share here.
He said that if he can't remember a person's name, it could be highly likely that this person might not remember his name either. So, he let's the other person off the hook by just saying " Hi, I'm...... we met a while back, please remind me of your name I forgot it." Now the other person can just answer with their name without feeling embarrassed.
Now I have a nice way out in the future, if I forget!
How to let them off the hook
Good idea! I may try it next time. Still it may be offending to them that you think they don't remember your name. What happens if they say "Yes I remember your name very well..." thinking for themselves "...obviously you do not remember mine..."
Definitely, apologizing and moving on is good for most cases too. As it was mentioned, it shows you are honest and not afraid to admit a mistake. Just do not repeat it often with the same person.
I guess the choice depends on the case and comfort level you have with each approach.