One On Ones Are Business Meetings

Submitted by mauzenne on Sun, 08/15/2010 - 16:12.

This guidance addresses questions about the purpose and value of One on Ones, particularly for those directs who challenge the need for them.

Probably one of the most frequently asked questions we get about One on Ones is, what do I do if one of my directs doesn't want to have them? Mind you, this is not the question that managers ask who are already doing One on Ones. They want to know how to handle the usually hypothetical situation of a direct who crosses their arms and won't talk. That's a different answer, for a different time.

This guidance is what to do if you haven't even started One on Ones, and someone says they're not interested, they don't need them, they think it's necessary, we talk all the time, I'm not much of a talker, just read my reports, I'm someone who doesn't need to be managed, I'm too busy, my role is special, the last guy didn't do them, we've never done them before, is everybody else going to do them, why are you singling me out, I don't need you to care about me, I'm not going to share stuff, do I get overtime for that considering how busy I am, who will cover my desk/work/machine/process while we're blabbing.

Those kinds of situations.

Not that they're common. But just in case.

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Submitted by WJRobbins on Sun, 08/15/2010 - 19:47.

Timely topic

Just wanted to say thank you to you both! I'm a (very) new manager and your site was referred to me by a friend and current manager and he was absolutely correct...you guys are awesome, and provide an invaluable resource for managers!

This is a perfectly timed podcast as I am in the beginning stages of introducing the O3's and had the exact same line of (incorrect) thinking regarding forecasting negative behaviors from my directs. I had drawn the same conclusions myself that one on ones were more personal than business in nature.

Thank you again for all you do!

William J. Robbins

Submitted by rsshilli on Fri, 09/03/2010 - 14:47.

Shy folks don't talk much

I've been doing 1-1s for over a year, and I still have direct reports that come to 1-1s without any questions and just wait for me to ask them. I always start with the same question, "How are things going?", have a few questions on paper in front of me that I've written down throughout the week, and finally end with "Is there anything I can do for you?".

Other people have lots to share and I have to book those at 4:00 with nothing afterwards so we can get through everything they want to talk about.

For those few rare shy people, our 1-1 never lasts more than 20 minutes. They don't share anything with me that I don't ask for. It's really strange. What am I doing wrong?

Submitted by krishead on Thu, 01/20/2011 - 23:50.

Nothing wrong

I don't think you're doing anything wrong.

If they don't want to contribute anything, I think you'd be making the situation uncomfortable by trying to draw information out of them.

Just move into your items and finish up at 20 minutes.

-Kris

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