Time to Party?

Ha! You guys would not survive the kind

Ha! You guys would not survive the kind of Xmas party we have here (the Ireland offices of a US multinational). Any management with any seniority is in a different country, and never attend the "local" parties in their own countries, all they do is pinch pennies from the party budget they are obliged to sign.
No opportunities for advancement there - by 8PM the music is so loud you can't hear yourself think, far less speak to anyone. Spouses are not permitted anyway, that would add too much to the budget. I last went 3 years ago, and this year I expect to be away on business anyway, at the time.
If "always being at work" is what it takes to be a successful manager, I would be asking myself serious questions on whether it's worth it...
- brian t

Mark.. what previous pod-cast do you

Mark.. what previous pod-cast do you discuss the proper way to greet someone other then - "Hi! Nice to meet you!" thanks

Mark may remember better, but I believe

Mark may remember better, but I believe it was in "Secrets of a Great Handshake": http://www.manager-tools.com/2006/04/secrets-of-a-great-handshake/

I'll save you a little bit of time though .... the most fundamental mistake folks make is that they don't answer with THEIR name. Someone just went through the trouble of introducing themselves; it would simply be polite to respond in kind. Unfortunately, as basic as this may seem, we witness it happening all the time.

Mike

Great podcast today, guys. The one

Great podcast today, guys. The one question I had in mind that I did not hear addressed was how long does one have to stay? Is there an acceptable minimum length of time? I've read different advice before on how long to stay and who to make sure you're seen by. Any thoughts? BTW for mgprice, greetings are also discussed in the recent Running Large Meetings cast. Keep up the good work, Mike and Mark!

I really enjoyed this one...... you

I really enjoyed this one...... you were both obviously having a lot of fun on this show.

Two years ago, I attended the company Xmas bash. All top management turned out in tuxedos and bow ties. I struggled into my jeans, T-Shirt and (what I still think is) cool Stanford University jacket, bought on holiday in San Francisco.

"Did you miss the dress code email?" someone asked as I arrived. Three months later I got promoted. Last year I wore the tux...

I guess I am the exception that proves the rule.

PS I'm afraid I'll still have to dance with the girls from Marketing though! ;-0

Keep the great casts coming guys - much appreciated!

Jim- Stay long enough to meet the

Jim-

Stay long enough to meet the hosts and thank them, or 90 minutes, whichever is longer. This rule assumes it's an evening party without a meal. If a meal is involved, you're obliged to stay through the meal.

You should also know that there is an UPPER limit at such parties. A weeknight party which starts at 7, even if no end time was posted on the invitation, really implies that you be gone by 1030.

And, is it really too long to stay until 1030, or let's say 10? Wouldn't kill you.

Mark

As I do all, I enjoyed the ”Party

As I do all, I enjoyed the ”Party Time” podcast. I agree with 99% of what was said - IF one is working in the U.S.

After two expatriate assignments and working in 30 plus countries, I can say that you must take local customs into account. This does not mean that you should try to copy and/or act like someone that was born and raised there; at best your poor attempts will come across as stupid, at worst patronizing.

That said, if the wife of your senior management comes over and greets you with a kiss to each check, you must know the appropriate response. If you do not, you will embrace yourself, the wife of your senior manager, and possibly your host.

If it is a centuries old custom for everyone in the room to (fill in the blank) - you must participate in some way; not doing so typically comes across as arrogance, not just ignorance.

The key is to do research well in advance and find a well respected native of the area to walk you through what to expect, and what will be expected of you. As a side benefit, this research will also provide you material for polite conversation with those sitting next to you during the meal. I have never found anyone that did not enjoy discussing local traditions with someone showing genuine interest and respect. One word of caution – DO NOT under ANY circumstances get into a comparison kind of discussion on your home-county’s traditions/customs! You do not want to take the chance that it could turn toward what could be perceived as a value judgment type of discussion.

Mark & Mike thank you for the great info and for making my commute time more productive!

The only exception I can think for

The only exception I can think for Japan is that since everyone pours everyone else's drinks, it could be a bit unsociable not to have more than one drink. That being said, the glasses in Japan for drinking are a lot smaller, so the trick is to drink only about 1/4 or 1/2 and someone will eventually fill your glass--especially if you are the boss/manager. Also, in Tokyo, most if not all people commute by train, so no worrying about driving.

My wife would kill me if I didn't take

My wife would kill me if I didn't take her to the party. My company rarely pays for spouses for anything which really steams her. So, when the opportunity does come up she is all in. For her, work is a huge part of my life and she wants to share that experience with me. Meet the people I talk about at home over dinner. She wants to see Bob who I don't like and Jill who helped me with that last project. If I didn't take her I'd be sleeping on the couch! But I certainly agree, no rules. If you can't trust your wife you're in a lot more trouble!

I work in Australia and I loved the

I work in Australia and I loved the cast (and all your casts). But I have to say - the one drink rule would not fly in this country and definitely not in media industries.

I've been in meeting with very senior managers who are inquring about potential hirees - and one of the questions that always comes up is "does s/he like a drink?".

Historically, most companies run an open bar on Fridays here and you are expected to have fun and keep up with the boss.

But I take (and already live by) your point that this is work and you need to stay sharp. But at my company, you need to be seen with a drink in your hand at parties (of course, the trick is to nurse the drink!).

Keep up the good work guys.

Hello, Guys! I am one of those late

Hello, Guys!
I am one of those late listeners that went and downloaded the whole bunch on podcasts. Since I had this week off from work, I inmersed myself in the Manager Tools world. So maybe this comment is a bit off time, but I thought I'd give it a shot anyway.
I live in Bogotá, Colombia, South America. Here, if the company is big enough, the company party includes dancing. That's right, salsa and merengue mostly. If there's music, moreover, if there's a band, you are in fact, expected to dance, and everybody should dance spouse or not. You're considered a "party pooper" if you don't. Of course, it doesn't hurt you one bit, if you're a great dancer. It would be impolite for a woman to reject an invitation to dance, especially if the person asking is a VP or a top manager.
Great show!

Thanks for the cultural distinction.

Thanks for the cultural distinction. It certainly makes sense to us.

Fascinating that impoliteness has to do with role power. Wow!

Mark

HI Guys I am an accountant who needs

HI Guys
I am an accountant who needs to improve my social skills- so when will you have the podcast for good conversation and how to leave a group. Thank you so much for your lessons because some how I missed these skills growing up.

MDM- I do think the conversation

MDM-

I do think the conversation podcast is due out this summer.

Glad you're here and self aware!

Mark

Mark&Mike I'm not so sure about

Mark&Mike

I'm not so sure about everyone who is saying one drink won't work for them. I live in Scotland and work-nights involve a lot of drink for everyone... however drinking very little is still the best move. You might not have the outrageous stories to share with your peers and other industry friends but senior management and customers know who they can trust. Showing discipline is always good.

Someone made a point about kissing though and this is important in Europe as a good handshakes. I took me a while to get this right but in London, especially, this is crucial.
When the video-casts come out you should do a handshake and kissing one.

Lincoln

it is that time of year again --- and I

it is that time of year again --- and I have looked and looked, but I have not found it. Where is the podcast mentioned in the "time to party" podcast about general conversation.

thanks for a GREAT product --- my kids even like listening to many of the podcasts on their iPods (they are 9 and 11)

>Mark Horstman Says:
>
>July 14th, 2007 at 3:00 am
>MDM-
>
I do think the conversation podcast is due out this summer.
>

Mark- You are so right! Alas, we

Mark-

You are so right! Alas, we have several factors that affect podcast release, and so we've delayed that one.

Won't be long, I hope!

Mark