This cast describes how to decide whether or not to give feedback to one of your directs based on someone else's input.

In a previous cast about third party feedback, we recommended ways to deliver feedback based on input from others. The important guidance there was to remember that other managers may not think in terms of behavior, whereas if you're going to give feedback, you have to know what the behavior was.

But we left out something that we get asked about a lot. How do I know whether or not to give the feedback, and what do I do if my directs say I'm wrong? That's a really good question.

And here's the answer.

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This cast describes how to deliver feedback to skip level associates.

Giving feedback is one of the most important activities of an effective manager. Or actually, more precisely, delivering performance communications is one of the most important activities of an effective manager. Manager Tools created the Manager Tools Feedback Model to make it easier for managers to deliver their performance communications to their directs.

But what about the REST of a manager's organization? Can you give feedback to a "skip" – someone who works for a manager who works for you?

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This cast describes a simple technique for controlling one's calendar, thereby keeping more time available for primary objectives.

Have you ever left the office thinking, hey, I got everything done today? All my projects, all those things on the backburner, finally everything is done?

We know how hard it is to get everything done every day – we never do. In fact, when we think about it, we realize we don't know anyone who DOES get everything done, EVER. Which makes us wonder, IS there some way to get everything done? And if there isn't, what's the best way to approach all of that work?

Here's a simple start in the right direction.

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This guidance recommends assigning both the reporting of work and the work itself when delegating.

If you're not a manager, you might be surprised what us managers think about when we assign work to our directs. If you're not a manager, you probably assume, hey, he gave me the work, I know it's mine, I'll do it, it's my job, after all. Easy to be him or her.

That's not always what we assume. Even with top performers, there are times when we wonder: Will it get done? Can they do it? Will they do it WELL? Will they do it on time? How will I know the status between now and when it's due? Will they let me know if something goes wrong? Why don't they proactively communicate more? Why do I have to go check? Am I going to have to have a difficult conversation? Am I going to end up having to do it myself?

At least for part of that, there's a solution. It's a simple thing, but it will save you hundreds of hours work over your career, and millions of moments of heartache and worry.

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This guidance disagrees with the old notion of praise in public, criticize in private, and recommends more effective behaviors.

Most of us have heard the phrase, Praise in public, criticize in private. Based on the title of this show, it's pretty obvious we disagree with the ideas. We won't argue that it doesn't mean well. It suggests some principles that make sense on a basic level. But too many of us think of it as the Holy Grail of performance communications, and then make bad choices based on its flaws.

Let's find out what's right, and what's wrong.

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This guidance recommends how to deliver both praise and feedback (though not together), and why they are both valuable – and completely different.

Lots of managers ask us about praise. Does positive feedback eliminate the need for praise? (No). What if I prefer to just give praise, and not positive feedback? (Sorry, doesn't work). Isn't praise just the opposite of negative feedback? (Definitely not).

What we think is that lots of us as managers just want to avoid being specific and direct. We understand why, and we're sympathetic. Work is hard, and generally most of us think we don't want to point out one small thing when there surely was ten good things we didn't see that day. We understand…and, we'll advocate for the directs. Managers are always telling us the same things, nearly at the same time: I really need more feedback from my boss, he owes it to me, I'm open to it, and he says he will. But, I'm not really comfortable giving feedback to MY team. I really need them, so I just give them lots of praise.

It's obvious that this managerial math doesn't really add up well…and that's why we're sharing how feedback and praise are both valuable, and how to give both.

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This guidance describes whether or not to give feedback in public, or in private . . . or neither.

At every conference we hold, public or private, we get asked about giving feedback in public or private. "Can I give feedback on the spot in front of others?" "I don't have to time to ask everyone to come to my office – what do I do?" "Can I give positive feedback in public, and just save the negative for private?" And, "Do I have to give all my feedback in my One on Ones?"

At least in part, these questions are based on the totally wrong historical guidance, Praise in Public, Criticize In Private. But we'll address why that guidance is wrong some other time. Here's how to decide what kind of environment is appropriate for giving feedback.

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This cast describes WHEN to give feedback. How fast is too fast? How slow is too slow?

When we coach or train managers on feedback, one of the most frequent questions we get is about WHEN to give feedback. How soon is too soon? Is there a point at which a manager has waited too long? Can I give feedback right away if there are others around? Should I wait and give a bunch at the same time?

When's right? And why? Here's when, and why, and how.

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This cast concludes our conversation on some situations where feedback isn't appropriate, because the error/mistake/infraction is so egregious, encouragement of effective future behavior isn't enough.

May 30, 2010 - 10:03 pm: File host provider has been contacted for support as premium audio file appears unavailable. Thanks for your patience!

Update May 31 - 4:50 pm: Premium audio file is now available!

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This cast describes some situations where feedback isn't appropriate, because the error/mistake/infraction is so egregious, encouragement of effective future behavior isn't enough.

What do you when one of your directs does something particularly egregious, something beyond the pale? It's SO bad, in fact, that you think it COULD be possible that you would fire them. What do you do?

Well, you don't give feedback.

Every once in awhile, at one of our conferences, or at client locations when we're coaching or training, we are asked about a dramatic incident involving a direct where a manager didn't know what to do. First off, don't feel bad if this has happened to you – drama and lack of an effective solution readily at hand. It happens a lot. We understand. Management may not be complex, but it is hard to do it well at times when risks and tensions are high, and we're responsible, but there's really no roadmap. We understand, because we've been there.

The incident they bring up might be an employee stealing, or a team member physically assaulting someone, or abusing someone, an employee or customer. We give guidance with phrases like, I'm thinking about firing you. Go home now. Or, Enough. Be quiet. You're close to losing your job. Would everyone else excuse us right now? The questioner is stunned…because that's not feedback.

So what DO we recommend managers do and say in one of these really unusual moments?

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