Sample Email for One-on-Ones
(Name)-
I’ve decided to start meeting individually with you (and everyone else on the team) on a weekly basis. We’ll call these meetings “one-on-ones” . I think this is a great way for us to maintain good, open communication, and continue to build our relationship. We’ll be meeting for 30 minutes once a week, at a pre-scheduled (and usually unchanged) time. It will be a private conversation - just you and I. We’ll meet at my desk - if you have concerns about privacy, we’ll talk about those once we get going.
The format of the 30 minutes will always be the same. The first 10 minutes are for YOUR agenda - anything you want to tell me, about anything. Your work, your family, your pets, your hobby, your challenges, your career, our working together. The primary focus of this meeting is going to be YOU. The middle ten minutes are for me, to share whatever I need to with you. We’ll probably talk about projects you and I are working on, stuff I need from you, and things I’ve heard from up above. It will NOT be a team meeting with only one attendee; that is, I’m not just going to give you a ton of stuff to take notes on. The last 10 minutes are for us to talk about the future - your career, training, development, opportunities, etc. In my experience, a lot of the time you’ll take 15 minutes, and I will too, so we won’t get to the last segment. But that’s okay, if we’ve covered what YOU want to cover, and I get a few minutes.
You may be thinking, “can I trust him?” Well, I hope so. I can tell you, if you want to complain, I’m willing to listen. If I’m messing up, I’m ready to hear it. I expect you to deliver it fairly and professionally, and I’ll be willing to have a dialog with you. This will also give me a chance to share feedback and coaching with you on things you’re trying to improve on. I encourage you to be as open as you can be, and over time I bet we both will get more comfortable.
Some of you may say, “gee, we talk all the time.” And, you’d be right, but a lot of those conversations are very short. And, they’re usually about something very specific, so we don’t get to share more info or go into more detail. Our one-on-ones will allow us to do that. You may also be thinking, “what will we talk about?” From everything I’ve learned about them, we will EASILY fill up the time. After we get past the first meeting jitters (”am I in trouble because I’m at the bosses’ cube/in the bosses’ office?” (YOU’RE NOT!)), I suspect we will find plenty to talk about.
This is not a one time deal. We’re not going to do this for a while and then stop. I’m not trying to do this with everyone just to hide talking to one of you. This is my way of getting to know you all better, because the better we know each other, the better work we will do together.
Below is a schedule of possible times. I have already blocked all these times on my calendar, so I should be able to keep them. I admit, if (insert manager’s boss name here) wants me, I may have to reschedule. But, if someone requests my time on the outlook calendar, it will show as busy. IF THERE IS ANY WAY I CAN KEEP THIS MEETING, I WILL. PERIOD.
Maybe in the first few weeks, we will juggle things a bit, to figure out what works best for everyone. I’ve not done this before, so we’ll mess up a little. I believe it will ABSOLUTELY be worth it.
I look forward to your replies requesting a time slot! (If there are conflicts, we’ll work them out.)
regards,
(You!)
September 20th, 2005 at 7:23 am
[…] Sample Email for One-on-Ones […]
January 3rd, 2006 at 10:53 am
I just listened to your One-on-One podcasts during a long drive and enjoyed it very much, but I do have a question. What if my direct reports are highly distributed so that face-to-face weekly meetings are prohibitive? Do you still recommend doing them via phone or does that loose some of their value?
January 3rd, 2006 at 11:05 pm
Ok, I just listen to the next podcast and got the answer (sorry I’m a bit behind). THe answer was phone one-on-ones are acceptable and can be very effective.
January 5th, 2006 at 9:10 pm
Your One-on-One podcasts are full of practical advice. I do have a question though. I am a Help Desk manager and a very important part of job is simply to be there to answer the phone to support our customers. If I have O3’s at my desk how can I best explain to my boss that I am really doing an equally important part of my job, which requires me NOT to answer the phone for those 30 minutes? Thanks!
January 6th, 2006 at 12:46 pm
David-
Good question! We have this discussion all the time with clients. The way you tell your boss that what you’re doing is valuable… is to sit down with your boss and tell him what you’re doing is valuable. Explain how you’re coaching, giving feedback, checking in, etc. He may not believe it… that’s a funcition of him/her and the culture.
On the other hand, show him/her your schedule of all the times you are in meetings AWAY FROM YOUR DESK. Those items prove that there already are some things that justify you not taking calls. Why can’t you justify not taking calls while at your desk..partcularly when what you’re doing at your desk is helping your team handle calls better?
I get this all the time in call centers, and usually these thoughts work. Let me know if you need more help.
It’s a privilege to serve you.
Mark
January 18th, 2006 at 9:33 pm
I enjoyed your podcast on O3’s and am in the process of scheduling them with my staff. The problem I am running into is that I don’t have enough open slots on my calendar to schedule weekly O3’s with all of my team which includes 8 sys analysts, 4 project managers and 1 trainer. I have several standing weekly meetings already booked to meet with each project team, my boss, the mgmt team and the business units I support. Would it be ok to schedule the O3’s with my most junior staff members only?
Thanks.
January 19th, 2006 at 7:10 pm
Renea-
This is a hard question to answer without sounding unfeeling, so bear with me.
The short answer is no. It’s not GENERALLY effective to have one on ones with a part of your org, no matter what the rationale.
I have coaching client who is the CEO of a billion dollar division of a major multinational corporation. He has 10 direct reports, sits on the board, meets monthly with Wall Street Analysts (for which the preparation is GRUELING), is married and has 2 small children. He drives himself to work and home, goes home at normal hours, and last year he wasn’t doing one on ones. He, too, said he didn’t have time. He is often TRIPLE scheduled.
He now does O3s religiously, and cannot imagine how he managed his life without them. He found that he GAINED time with O3s.
I know it would be easy for a manager to say, “well, but he’s CEO, he can move stuff around easly, whereas I have to go when the meetings are scheduled.” All I can say to that is that is NOT how a CEO’s life truly is, and there was a bit of pain in his commitment to O3s… but it paid off.
To prove I am a nice guy, I’d be happy to look at your calendar if you like. Send me a MONTH worth of your calendar from Outlook, printed on daily pages, to my address below… and I’ll analyze it and figure out how to make it happen.
It can be done. I would bet you could schedule some of the meetings right before or after all the project meetings you go to, or do some delegating, or ask your team to make some suggestions based on what they know about your time and commitments.
Could you go to every other week if it truly is impossible? Yes… but you would be the first manager I’ve ever seen do that with only 13 directs…
I hope this helps!
Mark
Manager Tools
110 W. Live Oak
Fredericksburg, TX 78624
January 21st, 2006 at 9:28 am
I´d like to know how much I should delegate this? We have an ad agency 30 on staff and busy, so it is not realistic I do all. Or doing 15×30mins and rotate biweekly? Thus meeting all every 2nd week?
January 21st, 2006 at 8:30 pm
Per (?)-
Thanks for the question; not sure I understand your situation well enough to know how to recommend you proceed.
Do all 30 of your folks report directly to you? If that’s the case, unless everyone does the exact same job and the responsibilities are the same and easily taught and easily recruited for, then you have too many directs. NO ONE is a good enough manager to handle 30 directs.
I am guessing that you have some of those 30 in roles reporting directly to you, and the rest of the 30 report to them. Generally, the person to whom someone reports is the “manager” with whom they have their weekly O3.
if you would, describe for me your org chart, and I’ll suggest who should be doing O3s with whom.
Hope this helps!
Mark
February 1st, 2006 at 11:11 pm
Oh, man. Weekly one-on-one’s are for micro-managers. Run for the hills!
February 2nd, 2006 at 12:48 am
Matt-
LOL! Thanks for the counter argument.
For what it’s worth, the micro-managers I’ve worked with and for, and those whom I’ve coached, DON’T like one on ones. They can’t wait that long to give guidance, don’t need anyone to prepare reports because they ask incessant questions about where every project and task is, hoping to catch someone just finishing so they can give them their next marching orders. In continuing this terribly inefficient, ineffective and unprofessional behavior, they quickly kill one on ones because they already know everything and don’t need any input anyway.
What’s more, the managers who MOST benefit from O3s are super delegators who have HUNDREDS of things to do in their heads every moment and need some forum/device to free their minds to do their actual job (and at the top levels, it is NOT a task list).
But keep the candor coming!
It’s a privilege to serve you,
Mark
(who is at Mike’s house this week, came upstairs for coffee at midnight, and saw Mike’s laptop logged in to Manager Tools, and so responded from Mike’s machine.)
February 2nd, 2006 at 2:37 pm
Mark - If you’re drinking coffee at midnight surely you can finish the book….
Does anyone have any experience with using a wiki application for team message boards/collaboration tools? Just read an article about this, and it dovetailed with a conversation I had within my org re using knova for tech support, and an open source type solution seemed like a good idea. Basically a giant virtual whiteboard for all types of applications. Thanks in advance.
February 2nd, 2006 at 4:10 pm
Joey,
I’ve had two experiencing with using a wiki for team collaboration.
1) Mark and I use a wiki for collaborating on show notes. This works *extremely* well for our purposes.
2) I’ve also used a wiki as a communications method for another partnership (executive and management communications). This has worked poorly. Definition of “poorly”? How about, “nobody uses it but me!”
My experience has been that wikis require a more advanced user who is comfortable with mark-up language. The hurdle of the mark-up language, as simple as it is, is a fairly difficult thing to get people past. AND, if they aren’t particularly interested in collaboration, it’s even worse. However, I suspect that if the understanding of the need for collaboration is firmly rooted in the team’s conciousness, it can work extremely well. Bottom line, if you have a team of folks who are excited and looking to collaborate, go for it! If, on the other hand, you’re trying to foster a spirit of collaboration by putting up a wiki, I think your running uphill … work on getting the need understood and commitment to collaborate first.
Mike
(The REAL one)
February 2nd, 2006 at 7:39 pm
Good point - better shoes won’t actually make you want to go out and run, at least not long-term. The team is into it, we’re just looking for a tool. I played awhile with jotspot - pretty neat. What do you two use, and why do you like it?
Do you know of one that allows/has templates for editable orgcharts?
Speaking of, for all the Getting Things Done folks, I’ve also been playing with MindManager - heard it mentioned in a personal productivity podcast. There’s a brainstorming feature that’s great - fits right into the initial implementation process of creating a master list and assigning categories. You can export to an outline in word and sync w/ outlook tasks too….
Sorry, I guess this is far afield of One on Ones - feel free to move this somewhere else if you see fit.
Thanks.
April 8th, 2006 at 7:06 pm
Gents,
Do you recommend one-on-ones for your military listeners? What about the when the schedule is just too engaging (e.g. combat ops)? Is it okay to do one-on-ones at the beach and not when the squadron is forward deployed?
By the way, I love the show! Mark, you articulate so many great points, it is tough to keep all of the great information in my head. When is the Effective Manager due out? Not only would a buy a copy for myself, but I would buy several copies of your book to give to the officers in the ready rooom.
All the best,
Mike
April 9th, 2006 at 2:25 am
Mike-
A great question. And Mike and I are always glad to hear from military members!
No, we don’t recommend one on ones during combat ops, and maybe even many deployments. I think that it’s times like those that (a) the optempo really is such that it’s not feasible, and (b) those are the times the one on ones you’ve done for weeks, months, years pay BIG DIVIDENDS. Your relationships with your troopers will be at their best, and you will see signs of your org struggling long before someone else does who doesn’t know their team as well as you do.
Other than that, we strongly recommend them. Mine started in the Army, and they helped enormously.
Thanks for the encouragement on the book! I’ve been diligently working on it. To tell the truth, were it not for comments like yours, it WOULDN’T be progressing. I’m running my own company, Mike and I really have ended up with full time jobs in Manager Tools, and I have 3 children. My goal - I thyink I committed pretty firmly to this on the boards earlier p- is to finish the manuscript this year.
Believe me, the Manager Tools community will know about every step it goes through.
Thanks for your kind words, and we’re glad we’re able to serve YOU as you serve us.
Mark
June 21st, 2006 at 10:44 am
I’ve been doing 1-1s for a while now, since I had 2 reports. Now I have 8, and we are adding a layer of managers b/w me and the 8 reports. As I manage managers, how much do I require of their management style (ie require them to do 1-1s with their staff), and how much do I step back in order to not micro-manage?
Thanks in advance, and I *LOVE* Manager Tools!
June 22nd, 2006 at 2:20 am
Jason-
Glad you love us. Feeling’s mutual.
Were I to simply say, “yes, it’s normal that a director require his managers to manage his way,” you could go out and get a LOT of people to say I’m nuts - it’s just NOT done that way. People mistakenly believe that management is nothing more than an external representation of your personality, and you get “to be yourself”. At least, this is their justification for why no one “requires” subordinate managers to manage “their way.”
Of course, these same people will DECRY the poor state of management today, and the lack of professional practice associated with it. We have standards for reviews, for raw material inspections, for doing strategy (SWOT, Blue Ocean, etc), 360 feedback (anonymize, standardized), expense reporting, meetings (when done well). The fact is, management is the last great frontier for professionalization.
If your company can require to fill out reviews in a standard fashion that no one ever reads, you can require your subordinate managers to conduct one on ones, and teach them the way to do coaching and feedback. You could make part of their professional development using our podcasts (and if your boss doesn’t like this FREE content, he’s an idiot).
Of course, you don’t have to “require” any behavior… you can simply suggest, and differentially reward those that figure it out.
But here’s the most important thing: one on ones, coaching and feedback - the Professional Management Trinity - are only the start. Requiring these three things is neither mandating anything onerous, nor, least of all, requiring a certain management “style”.
Bottom line: asking them to do these things is reasonable and effective. Not expecting them to use it is the equivalent of allowing them to hire anybody they want without an interview, because that is their “management style,” and then defending them when the person tanks.
Mark
July 3rd, 2006 at 4:09 am
[…] Manager Tools ” Sample Email for One-on-Ones Sample Email for One-on-Ones. (Name)- I’ve decided to start meeting individually with you (and everyone else on the team) on a weekly basis. … I am a Help Desk manager and a very important part … need some forum/device to free their minds to do their … […]
July 26th, 2006 at 1:17 pm
Hey guys, first time blogger, long time listener. Wanted to say thank you for your insight and experience for those of us first-time managers. As I have observed from previous jobs and now my current role, I am in total agreement with your comments that “management is the last great frontier for professionalization.”
Back in May, I began conducting O3’s with my eight reports, and then had follow ups in June. I lead an entire virtual team, so we see each other about three times a year, with July being one of those times. Never being one to keep a good thing quiet, I introduced M-T.com to another Senior RM and discovered the O3 e-mail. Beautiful! I just sent it out to my team (modified, of course) as I have them scheduled for next Monday and Tuesday. I just received my first 360 that you previously noted, which will give me an opportunity to put some changes into place in the way in which I interact with my direct reports.
I enjoyed the podcast on virtual teams as this one was directly related to my situation. - JD
July 26th, 2006 at 8:57 pm
JD-
Glad we’re helping you be effective!
It’s a privilege to serve you.
Mark
August 26th, 2006 at 10:35 pm
Is there anyway to Download the Podcast for One on Ones to my itunes? I just started downloading and I would like to listen to these broadcasts?
I really enjoy the Broadcast and think they have helped me tremendously already.
Thank you!
August 28th, 2006 at 1:46 am
To put podcasts that have “rolled off” of the feed, download them to your PC (right-click the link and “Save Link As …”. Then you can drag the files onto the appropriate playlist within iTunes.
Hope that helps!
Mike
September 16th, 2006 at 3:49 pm
I used the sample email with a bit of hesitation. I moved from being a peer to a supervisor about 2 years ago and O3s had not had a positive history in our department. So, when I rolled out the O3s again, I expected the usual rolling of eyes and mutterings of “this will never work - she’ll never keep up with it.” The email was great because it outlines the expectations of everyone. I kept up with it and now, even though we had to modify the O3s from weekly to bi-monthly due to travel schedules, my staff are coming to me saying how much they miss our weekly conversations! I feel so out of touch without them and my staff have a new-found respect for me because I have valued their time and work. Thanks for such great tools!
September 16th, 2006 at 9:15 pm
Jennifer-
Glad they helped! Keep in mind, you can do (thousands of managers already are) O3s over the phone. I find it very powerful to remind me of the value of the time, and staying connected.
It’s a privilege to serve you.
Mark
October 18th, 2006 at 5:46 pm
Logged in, but not showing username
October 19th, 2006 at 2:37 am
twgk,
Your specific issue is fixed, but you identified a larger issue that I’ll need help from our software vendor on.
Thanks for bringing to my attention!
regards,
Mike
November 3rd, 2006 at 11:50 am
Hi Guys,
Quick question: In regards to O3’s, I have 54 employees that report directly to me. How can effectively do O3’s in a manner that won’t burn any of us out. I have three shifts 7-3, 3-11, 11-7 and there are some very busy times and they are not easy to pull in due to the fact that I may to have other staff cover them for the 1/2 hour. I do a little bit of MBWA during the morning when I come in and in the afternoon before I leave. Any suggestions?
November 3rd, 2006 at 9:44 pm
Todd-
Well, it’s tough in the job that you do. i would go to every other week for full time employees and every month for part timers. I would schedule them at the start at end of shifts, leaving a gap right at the end for admin, and that way catch people but not kill yourself.
It’s not perfect… but it will help a great deal. I once had a nurse manager with 90 directs, and she made it work.
Mark
November 4th, 2006 at 2:19 am
Mark,
Thank you! That definately gives me a starting point. I did speak with a few of my nurses today and they thought it was a great idea! That’s the start. I’ll keep you posted.
Todd
February 5th, 2007 at 8:25 am
Thanks so much! I was desparate for help over a couple of issues and think that this and resolving conflict one together will help a lot. In using your email template, I did make one alteration because of past experience that you might find interesting.
“Please don’t keep things bottled between meetings, of course. If you have an issue, I encourage you to deal with it professionally and immediately, but if it hasn’t been resolved or you aren’t sure how to resolve it, of course you can bring it up. No censorship aside from the ½ hour limit and a chance for both of us to speak.”
I am the founder and CEO of a non profit organisation where I can only be in the office for all tasks three to four days a week, so it will be a struggle, but I also took the delegation quiz and became clear how much I need to help other people do their jobs much better which should free me up to do these more and help others succeed. I am committed to making the org. strong enough to survive without me if a new person comes in - hard with founder of an arts organisation - but have been told by senior programmers that the place fell apart and felt ruderless without me - not a good sign. Any other suggestions???
Also, we have a new format for engaging staff during our mandatory monday morning staff meeting - many different programs with similar issues, which is why we insist on them - we get a different person to “host” each week, bringing muffins or whatever they want and setting the agenda, while also deciding on a braistorming item that they want to focus on. The host for the week chairs the meeting and encourages leadership. It’s been a great solution and engaged people much more, and stops senrios from hogging all the time.
Thanks so much again.
Chris
February 9th, 2007 at 2:31 pm
Hi Guys,
I just found out about podcasts a couple of months ago and have started listening to Manager Tools - They’re excellent!!! Thank you so much for all the advice.
I was just promoted from Team Leader to Supervisor in a different department in my company. Previously, I had one-on-ones, provided feedback, coaching and mentoring in my current company as well as my previous one, however, I did this in the capacity of a team leader, not a supervisor. I would like to begin scheduling one-on-ones, however, here are my questions:
1. Do you think having one-on-ones monthly can be just as effective?
2. My team leader is used to participating in these one-on-ones with her previous supervisor so I would like to include her in these discussion to help her develop - Will that work? Or do these meetings require to only 2 people involved?
3. Should I spend a little more time on the first one-on-one (1 hour maybe..)?
Thanks for your help!
Chris
February 13th, 2007 at 3:10 am
Hi fellas,
Thanks for the great content–very helpful.
A long-time friend recently became one of my directs. I’m sure this is fairly common, so I trust you’ve heard this one before; the O3’s are uncomfortable. Do you have any recomendations for dealing with a direct (or a manager, for that matter) with whom one has had a prior, non-business relationship?
March 21st, 2007 at 8:56 pm
Chris-
Yes, of course do one on ones. But only with those whose reviews you write.
And, only one boss in a one on one. A one on one is only ONLY with two people. If the team lead is someone’s boss, they should do that one on one and you should do ones with the leads.
No more time… it’ll work out.
Mark
March 21st, 2007 at 8:57 pm
John B-
Yes, my recommendation is to tough it out. You owe it to your friend to treat him professionally. Focus on work.
O3s are VERY powerful tools to keep you managing your friend rather than just hanging out with him (in the eyes of others).
Mark