Finish A Conversation

Submitted by mauzenne on Thu, 02/03/2011 - 23:53.
in

This cast gives our guidance on how to finish a conversation.

At least once a month we're asked: is there a way to help a conversation draw to a close without diminishing the relationship building aspect? Most recently, this came up on a forum post which Mark answered, but it comes up so often, we thought we'd answer it in a cast.

We just wish it wasn't that all of the people who ask it weren't incredibly high D's who constantly interrupt and have short attention spans. (Not casting aspersions - it's true of us too).

Literally, we have NEVER met someone who has asked me this question who, when asked for an example, didn't want to end a conversation after an abruptly short period of time, after having appeared to have been tapping their fingers in irritation within seconds. I've seen them expect conversations to be over ("okay, I've built this relationship, now let me go do IMPORTANT STUFF, BYE!") within 30 seconds. In the context of this posting, they would define "reasonable" as that 30 seconds.

But maybe that's not you. ;-)

So, if you think you've spent enough time:


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finnallred's picture
Submitted by finnallred on Fri, 02/04/2011 - 07:40.

Great advice

 Thanks for the great cast, which seems to have been written just for me. 

Just what I needed.

Andy    DiSC 7411  :)

 

Seriously, I just yesterday had a dilemma where I wanted to get back to a task, and the person talking just wouldn't shut up. It seemed to take hours, but might have been an entire minute. 

On the way home, I was thinking about how I should change/handle such situations, and then at home, this cast was available.

Brilliant content, and perfect timing.

Thanks,

Andy

artsmith222's picture
Submitted by artsmith222 on Thu, 02/17/2011 - 19:02.

 I appreciated this case

 I appreciated this case because it makes me feel better about letting people chat in m office. I've often wondered if I'm wasting time - no, I'm building relationships, since I'm willing to stay late (if needed, workload is light now). And it helps realize the problem with all the high D supervisors at our place who are missing the point of relationships. Hopefully the work I am doing will pay off one day.

stephenbooth_uk's picture
Submitted by stephenbooth_uk on Mon, 02/21/2011 - 13:37.

Just had to pause to say

 The story Mark tells about the boss who said to her housekeeper that when she asked "How are you?" she was just being polite and wasn't actually interested, I've been there.  On the housekeeper side.

There's a manager who I've known for some years and gotten on with reasonably well who when I first met her was a high-S (reporting to a very high-S).  Now she's moved up the organisation and is reporting to different managers who are much more High-D she has started to show some D traits herself.  A few weeks ago she asked me how I was and, as when she's done this in the past she's indicated that she is actually interested and I knew she was aware of a family issue I have going on, I mentioned I wasn't doing great and mentioned the latest on the family issue.  She immediately turned to me and said "I was just being polite, I didn't expect an answer."

We have had a good relationship in the past, I wouldn't say that this event damaged the relationship but it did put a bruise on it from my perspective. We haven't actually been in the same building at the same time since this event so I don't know if there will be any fall out or maybe if she spoke in haste and repented at leisure later.

Stephen

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